You’re So Sensitive

Call it a midlife crisis, call it a breakthrough, call it an astrological shit storm, call it whatever the heck you want, but I've been thinking a lot about L-I-F-E. As a sensitive, empathetic Pisces, I'm known for getting pulled into the depths of emotions and wonderings. But lately this has been spectacularly more intense than usual.

I've been thinking about whether I'm living the life I want to live, what I love, what I hate, what's inspiring me, what's draining me, my purpose, my path and whether I should take belly dancing or hip hop lessons (suggestions appreciated). 

My brain has been a pinball machine and the kid who's playing has an infinite number of quarters. I've stopped several times and thought what's wrong with me? 😅

The answer is really very simple: I'm human experiencing the world through an exceptionally sensitive body, mind and heart. 

I cry at my niece's basketball games, about the squirrel whose tail-hair mysteriously disappeared (and is now growing back). I probably spend more time than the average person crying over wildfires, bullying, sunsets, polluted oceans, and getting older. I grieve ev-ery-thing. It's physically painful at times and sometimes it can feel like my heart is constantly breaking.

As a highly sensitive person you can wind up walking through the world feeling very alone, misunderstood and too much for those around you. Let's get a couple things straight: this doesn't make you weird or bad or “too” anything. 

I know it doesn't feel like it sometimes, but your tenderness is a gift. Your humanness is what breaks you and puts you back together. Don't numb it, don't escape it because that'll only take you further away from life. Feeling is who you authentically are. 

Stay close. Stay close to what makes you who you are, to the rumblings and wonderings, to the discomfort and euphoria. Stay close to the water's edge, tightrope the thread of the cliff. Do not abandon yourself in the moments you feel misunderstood. Honor your weariness, your beauty, feel the depth of your pain. 

Stay close, stay close, stay close to the realness that makes you, you.